Category Archives: youth

Re-thinking Youth Ministry

Posted on October 4, 2009 | 5 Comments

Check out this video put together by Brett Kunkle:

I know what you might be thinking: “this guy is a bit over the top.  C’mon!  ‘Who’s waiting for our kids.’  This is just scare tactics.”

Don’t write Brett off.  He works with youth and has a circumspect angle that gives him a lot of insight into the state of youth in the church.  Also, I can vouch for the atmosphere of the college campus.  Lastly and most importantly, take a look at the stats (some of which he references).  If that doesn’t convince you he’s not hyping things up, nothing can; he has sociology research backing him up.

Some will also cheer this, as if it’s a sign that the Christian worldview itself is weak.  That is not the crux of it.  Watching the youth Brett trains engage with atheists and agnostics will show you that (see the testimony in the first link).  The evidence has been tried and found substantive.  In the last 30 years, for example, the Church has seen a renaissance in apologetics and philosophy from a Christian perspective.  Philosophy departments in universities are seeing more and more Christians–many of them evangelicals–produce first-rate work that cannot be ignored.   Moreover, witness the many debates between Christians and atheists.

This might seem paradoxical, since Brett points to the hostile environment on college campuses.  The number of Christians entering the philosophy field and doing great work is astonishing, but it has not reached a tipping point yet.   Furthermore, anyone with experience in any field where prestige and influence is at a premium knows how politics can play a part in who has control of the microphone (church is one of those fields!).  Hence the secular environment continues.

It’s a problem not of substance but of engagement.  Parents, youth leaders, and adults are not engaging youth in theology, apologetics, and deep things.  They are blinding themselves to the challenges their youth will face once they graduate (heck, they even face these challenges in high school!).  For example, Brett recently wrote about an exchange he had with a youth leader.  This youth leader told Brett that he was not teaching his youth group apologetics and theology, choosing instead to focus on “practical Christian living.”

The youth leader’s remarks reveals a very misguided false dichotomy.  His tack is, rather than being practical,  wholly impractical.  Why?  Because, as Brett puts it, “you are what you think.”  Much sociological and neurological research confirms this.  What’s more, the Bible confirmed this well before sociology and neurology were born (Romans 12:1-2, Phil 4:8-9, 1 Tim 4:16, and a host of other verses): solid thinking is at the heart of discipleship unto Christ.

Again, take a look at the youth Brett trains.  After he teaches them and takes them on one of his apologetically-focused missions trips to Cal Berkeley, they come back on fire.  Far from being made into overly aggressive devotees with big brains but dead hearts, their faith is alive.  They are living for Jesus.

The most practical thing that adults can do for Christian youth is teach them logic; teach them Church history; teach them theology; teach them about the reliability and transmission of the Bible; teach them about the claims of other worldviews and how to interact with them; teach them how to recognize a bad argument (there’s plenty of it out there on the university campus).

Why is it practical? Simply, when (not if) the challenges come their way on the college campus, they will be ready.  As C.S Lewis once said, “To be ignorant and simple now – not to be able to meet the enemies on their own ground – would be to throw down our weapons, and to betray our uneducated brethren who have, under God, no defense but us against the intellectual attacks of the heathen. Good philosophy must exist, if for no other reason, because bad philosophy needs to be answered. The learned life then, is for some, a duty.”

Ignore the outdated wording (e.g, heathen).  Lewis’ point is a good one.

There is a wealth of  knowledge out there that will adequately prepare our youth for the challenges of a secular college campus.  The question is: will adults give our youth access to it?  Like Brett says, it’s time to re-think the way we do youth ministry.

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Posted in philosophy, religion, youth

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Why Youth Leave the Church

Posted on December 31, 2008 | 9 Comments

Mike Erre, in his most recent book Death by Church, notes that young adults are leaving the church in “record numbers:”

“We should not be surprised, then, that the world these days objects more to Christians than to Christ. The hypocrisy of the Church is what keeps most away from Jesus…according to one survey, the three most common perceptions of present-day Christianity are ‘antihomosexual (an image held by 91 percent of young outsiders), judgmental (87 percent), and hypocritical (85 percent).’ The authors rightly conclude, ‘Modern Christianity no longer seems Christian.” [The kids in this study] had been to church and knew Christians and Christianity.”

He goes on to admit that this doesn’t mean we should skip the hard parts of the gospel message or tone things down, but that youngsters are, “simply objecting to what they see.”

He concludes: “Because of this, young adults are abandoning the church in record numbers.”

I can agree with what some of Erre says. No doubt, we in the church need to clean up our act, and our negligence of holiness has driven youth away. However, his picture is incomplete. He misses the fact that perhaps the largest factor is that we are not engaging the minds of the youth in our church.
How many youth groups are entertainment and social-group focused? How many youth groups shy away from giving the kids meat, preferring instead to make things “fun”?

I’m all for fun. The more, the better, in a sense. But we clearly are not preparing our young ones for college. They are getting picked off in record numbers, as Brett Kunkle demonstrates in this post.brettkunkle

Brett is a guy that interacts with youth for a living. Not only does he have the academic research to back up his claims, but he has direct experience…a lot of direct experience.

I brought him to speak to the Christian group at the school in which I teach. After he spoke, I spent some time picking his brain. One question I asked him was, “What is the main thing you’d teach as a youth pastor to prepare your kids for life after high school?”

His answer astounded me: “Rich, I’d teach them theology and apologetics.” It was that simple for him. Of course, if he talked on, he’d probably lay out some other things as well, and maybe some of his solutions would be more along the lines of Erre’s concern (another thing he puts at the forefront is getting students “in the game,” actively sharing their faith. He leads youth missions trips to Cal Berkely and Utah that do just that). However, it is significant that theology and apologetics were the first things on Brett’s mind.

Think this is just Balderdash? Read the book by Christian Smith that I link to above. In that book you will find that the #1 reason youth gave for leaving the church was “it just didn’t make sense anymore.” Most of the reasons gave were variations on that theme. Yes, hypocrisy by those in the church is *one* major thing that contributes to this confusion; but we’re kidding ourselves if we think that no training in doctrine and apologetics has little or nothing to do with it.

I can speak from experience. As a brand new Christian my first year of college, I can testify that were it not for books from the likes William Lane Craig and J.P. Moreland, and were it not for the astutely-trained men I knew from Intervarsity, Campus Crusade, and Athletes in Action, I would have given up the faith almost immediately after I picked it up.

Without Brett’s solution, we are leaving our youth naked and defenseless. No shield, no armor, no weapon, not even a slingshot…and the bullets are whizzin’ by fast.

Consider supporting Brett today. His is a vitally important ministry to both the church and the world.

Here are some related posts:

How Should we Interact with Youth?

The Ethics of America’s Youth

“Distracted to Death” Series (links to previous parts in series included)

Simon: Hot. God: Not

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Singleness: all the Rage

Posted on December 28, 2008 | 14 Comments

There’s no question that the times they are a changin’.  A boy born in 1900 has more in common with Moses than with a boy born in the 21st century.

One change that many have sought to comment on is the number of singles. Somewhere around 40% of Americans are unmarried. The average age of those marrying has risen significantly in the last 20 years (read the book in the first link for details).

mordantorange.com

photo credit: mordantorange.com

This has not gone unnoticed by many churches and pastors. As a current single man, I’m glad they are noticing. Their response, however, has left me disappointed. Many churches and pastors have responded by emphasizing marriage and family less (Most of Driscoll’s recommendations are solid…its just the implications of the first paragraph that I take issue with) and have focused more on coaching singles to “remain content” in their singleness.

Now, I’m all about remaining content in where you are at. That’s what Philippians 3:14 is all about, after all (NOT a prooftext for athletes searching for sporting victory!). However, what bothers me is what these folks think “being content” looks like.

If a single person voices his desire to get married today, more often than not he will get a rebuke from both the world and the church. Those in the church might say something like this: “Paul says its better to be single. You can serve God better. You just need to be content and focus on Christ. If God wants you to marry, He’ll bring you a mate. Don’t take matters into your own hands. If you do, that’s getting in the way of God’s plan for you.”

The problems with this are legion. First, we miss the fact that 1 Cor 7 was instruction given “because of the present crisis.” I don’t think today in the West falls under a “present crisis.” Paul wasn’t talking about the Dow crumbling. When Christians in the West start getting the slow boil in oil for their faith, then by all means, we should put marriage on the backburner, but until that time…

Secondly, celibacy, not singleness, is in mind here! Paul was talking about a permanent, no sex, no dating, no “cuddle buddy,” no “friends with benefits” state. How many of us singles who glibly tout the “singleness is better” line can embrace that FOR LIFE?

So “Jesus is the only man I need” hmmm? Really? (note to the ladies: if you say this, most men will take you at your word. Meaning: we will ask other women out. So don’t say something like this, then turn around and wonder why guys don’t ask you out.)

The biblical model is: if you can be celibate for life and not be bitter, go for it. That is a very high and worthy calling. Otherwise, young man, get movin’ and find a spouse.

Thirdly and more to the point, why is dating and marriage the ONLY place where we think its wise to say, “just be content. Don’t get in the way of God’s plan. If He wants to give you X, He’ll bring it to you?” Would we say that when it comes to finding a job? A house? A church? Evangelism? Sanctification and holiness? No.

It’s not either/or, as in “either I do it myself, or I let God do it.” In the economy of the Kingdom, it’s both/and: we do our part, and God does His. You can’t just expect a spouse to fall in your lap. Though God can and does that from time to time, we have a part to play in the process. Though one can have an idolatrous obsession with dating and marriage, it is very good to actually prepare yourself for marriage, and this includes seeking a spouse…at the very least, putting yourself in a position where you will bump into good candidates.

Fourth, pastors and churches who tail back marriage and family issues miss that what typically fills the void is not biblical and holy. Though a few, no doubt, will focus on serving God more, a whole swath of singles will instead use that message to indulge in adultolescence. There will be an increase in recreational dating, and an increase in delayed responsibility. People will not just marry later; they will needlessly delay marriage, and this has a cost to it.

We singles need help not in remaining single, but in marrying well. This goes past a few sermon series on God’s view of sex and how its good. This goes past pre-marital counseling.

Le me issue a plea: we need help in actually preparing for marriage! Encouraging us to delay brings hidden costs, costs that we don’t realize until its too late. We *will* date. Will you help us date well? Will you help us actually meet godly members of the opposite sex?

And really, Bible friends, having someone want to set you up isn’t that big a deal. I don’t know why people are so freaked out about it. Yeah, there needs to be some guidelines in place, but really, if someone wants to set me up, then I appreciate the help (not now, though…I’m taken. :) ).

Please, please don’t respond by thinking we want a “meat market.” Don’t set fire to that straw man.

This attempt at *catering* (not ministering) to singles by scaling back focus on marriage and family is the cure that will kill the patient. It might make singles feel better, but in the end it is not single friendly.

As Candace Watters notes, “Helping Christian families form is still a fundamental role and responsibility of the body of Christ. God created the institution of family even before he created the church. Family is the institution that, for most of us, will be our primary area of spiritual shaping and development. It’s where we grow in our faith, learn how to serve others, and become more like Christ.”

“Pushing the family message to the margin is not the answer. Better to tolerate some of the quirks of a marriage-friendly church.”

“The good news for singles is that churches with a healthy perspective and emphasis on the biblical family are more likely to be a helpful place for finding a spouse and forming a family of their own.”

We need real solutions. We do not need more mimicking of the world.

In addition to the links above, be sure to check out the following related posts:

Top 5 Things Women Find Attractive in Men

The Dating List

Redefining the Family

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Redefining the Family

Posted on December 20, 2008 | 2 Comments

Motte Brown at Boundless comments on the Census Bureau’s solution to problems with the family.

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Posted in politics, youth

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Relevance

Posted on December 16, 2008 | 3 Comments

I was at a teacher workshop the other day, and the topic of student boredom came up. We were all trying to find ways to excite our students and to make our lessons more relevant to them.

What teacher hasn’t heard a student say, “this stuff is boring. When are we gonna learn something that’s actually relevant to our lives?”  Public and private school teachers, as well as pastors and Sunday school teachers, hear this quip often.

On the one hand, this desire for relevance touches upon a good point–far too often, we bore our students in education (whether in the church or in public education) with senseless drivel. The current obsession with standardized testing is a common example. Though accountability and measuring gains is a good thing, focusing on test taking skills and multiple choice exams is killing our kids’ enthrallment with learning.

But on the other hand, the quip misses something. For starters, our definition of relevance is skewed. We lean too much on “yankee pragmatism” and immediate gratification/application.

The prevailing attitude is that if its not immediately relevant or applicable, its bosh. But we miss that for some things, the pay off is later and isn’t immediately obvious.

This is an excerpt of a letter from a 17-year old C.S Lewis. It will blow your socks off:

You ask me how I spend my time, and though I am more interested in thoughts and feelings, we’ll come down to facts. I am awakened up in the morning by Kirk splashing in his bath, about 20 minutes after which I get up myself and come down. After breakfast & a short walk we start work on Thucydides a desperately dull and tedious Greek historian (I daresay tho’, you’d find him interesting) and on Homer whom I worship. After quarter of an hour’s rest we go on with Tacitus till lunch at 1.

I am then free till tea at 4.30: of course I am always anxious at this meal to see if Mrs K. is out, for Kirk never takes it. If she is I lounge in an arm chair with my book by the fire, reading over a leisurely and bountiful meal. If she’s in, or worse still has ’some people’ to tea, it means sitting on a right angled chair and sipping a meagre allowance of tea and making intelligent remarks about the war, the parish and the shortcomings of everyones servants. At 5, we do Plato and Horace, who are both charming, till supper at 7.30, after which comes German and French till about 9. Then I am free to go to bed whenever I like which is usually about 10.20.

I remind you: he was 17 when he wrote this!

According to our current definition of “relevance” his education was completely useless…but so much the worse for our skewed views of education. Obssessed with quickly “hooking” our students and congregants into our lessons, we bemoan: “ah, that stuff just isn’t relevant to us today! What does studying Homer and Greek have to do with life?”

Answer: plenty. Tackling hard things carves character into one’s soul. It makes one’s mind go deep. In addition, we often miss that works from men like Homer have survived the test of time because they touch upon universal themes. It might take some considerable digging, but one will find in the classics deep and rich commentary on the questions that have captured and vexed humans from the beginning.

Can’t we just realize that this stuff is just plain interesting, even if that interest takes a while to surface and even if you can’t “do anything” (i.e. make money or get a job) with it?

Boy we have missed the boat!

I daresay that the education displayed in this letter was and still is terribly relevant. Just because the payoff isn’t immediate and encased in flashing lights doesn’t mean its beneath us. Sometimes the biggest payoffs come after many years of plodding through tough, hard-to-chew-on-material that seems dull at the time. Lewis , due in part to the classical education he received as a youngster, led a full, wise, joyful, and yes, relevant life. That man “sucked the marrow” out of life. I can only dream of how interesting and invigorating it must have been to spend time with him.

I’m not suggesting that we all turn around tomorrow and drag our students through marathon readings of Tacitus or that we totally forget about exciting lessons. We need balance, and that calls for us to remember the shortcomings of our modern ways of thought.

We neglect the lessons of Lewis’ life to our kids’ peril.


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Posted in philosophy, youth

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Dealing with Balderdash

Posted on December 9, 2008 | 3 Comments

Yesterday I wrote a post on Richard Dawkins and one of his latest books titled The God Delusion.

That post garnered a few comments. One of them was from a gal named Susan.

Click on the link above to see the post and her comment. I think her comment deserves its own post.

Susan,

First, I think you misunderstood my first line. After I said being an atheist “is all the rage” I said “at least that’s what you’d think by a selective viewing of the media.” That second sentence makes a difference–my point was that a small batch of very evangelical atheists are utilizing the media to try to make theistic belief passe’ and unthinkable. Their books have sold well, and they are all over the media.

I looked up some of the passages you cite, and I have no clue how you can make them out to be saying “who you should kill” or “who you should hate.”

Here are a few examples:
Luke 19:27–The *Parable* of the ten talents. Jesus is *telling a story* about servants who were given a certain amount of money to invest. Two of the servants invest the money and get a return, the last one kept the money laid away.

In v26, Jesus gives the overall point. He quotes the king in the story: “I tell you that to everyone who has, more will be given, but as for the one who has nothing, even what he has will be taken away. v27–But those enemies of mine who did not want me to be king over them–bring them over here and kill them in front of me.”

–I ask: where in that do you get that the Bible commands Christians to “kill those who do not believe in Jesus”?

Second example: Leviticus 26:29 Read the whole passage. It is about the punishment Israel will receive if they break the covenant and disobey God.

v27: “If in spite of this you still do not listen to me but continue to be hostile toward me, then in my anger I will be hostile toward you, and I myself will punish you for your sins seven times over. You will eat the flesh of your sons and the flesh of your daughters. I will destroy your high places…”

–I ask: where in the world do you get that God is commanding Christians to kill children and babies of enemies?

Third example: 1 Cor 11:14
In a section on appropriateness in worship, Paul says, “Does not the very nature of things teach you that if a man has long hair, it is a disgrace to him, but that if a woman has long hair, it is her glory?”

Sounds to me like the same thing as saying in *our culture* “guys, don’t show up to church in a dress, ok? Its appropriate for women, but not for you.”

Where did you get from that that the Bible commands Christians to “hate men with long hair?”

Susan, did you even read these verses? I’m not going to bother going through every one, because its not worth it.

Afterall, by the looks of it, it appears as if you didn’t give a second thought to this list at all. Why should I?

It looks like you merely copied them from some crack-pot atheist website. The danger of making lists like this is that some people will actually look up the passages and call your bluff. If you want me to take you seriously, you have to do better.

And your attempt to try to make context reading “namby-pamby” is…well, I don’t know what to call it, but its definitely not persuasive. Susan, all you are doing is name calling and using loaded language without argument, which is the very same thing the “New Atheists” do themselves.

Reading things in context is something we do naturally all the time outside the Bible, so why do you cry foul when we try to do it with the Bible?

Let me illustrate. Lets say I get a letter in my email from a girl I just took out on a date. It begins:

“Rich, I had fun last night. You are cute and funny.”

Pretty good, eh? Not so much. The letter continues:

“Funny looking, that is. You are only cute in the sense that my pug is cute. I had fun because it was such a riot laughing…at you. Your breath smells like garbage and you have enough backhair to make a pine forest. Please stay away from me, you dweeby, socially-retarded stinko.”

Read *out of context*, the first line looks promising, but read *in context* it has a totally different meaning. We do this all the time, and for good reason–meaning in the written and spoken word flows from whole to parts. You can’t just rip a verse out of context and try to make it look like whatever. You especially can’t get away with not even quoting the verse, but just announcing the reference in a list and slapping some title on it like “who you should kill.”

Are you kidding me?

And your last jab about “please don’t hurt anybody” is frankly childish and patronizing. If you want to discuss contrary views on this blog, you are welcome to. Bring the heat. But don’t talk down to me. That will get you banned.

Susan, the confidence and, yes, arrogance you display is not warranted by the strength of your arguments.

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Posted in personal interest, philosophy, random, religion, Wahala, youth

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Nuttin’ But Stringz

Posted on December 6, 2008 | 1 Comment

You’ve simply gotta see these guys. After seeing them on America’s Got Talent, I became an instant fan. I’m absolutely gobsmacked they didn’t win…they should have, in my humble, yet-always-correct opinion.



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Posted in media discernment, personal interest, stories from my life, Uncategorized, youth

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