9) The Spirit led me to do that. Means, “I felt inspired in the moment, and I don’t want you to question my actions, so I’m blaming God.”
8) God is leading me to marry/date you. Means “You’re hot. Let’s mate…I mean, date.”
7) God is leading me to break up with you. Means “I’m just not that into you” and “I’m such a girly boy that I just can’t stomach making people feel bad.”
6) Have you prayed about it? Means, “I think you’re off your onion. You’re batty nuts, you know that?
5) I’ll pray about it. Means a) “I’m stalling,” b) “phhttt!! Like I’m gonna do it.” or c) “I’m a wussbag who can’t say no.”
4) That’s not my spiritual gift. Means a) “You need to find some other sucker who will do it,” b) “I fear man,” or c) “I’m lazy.”
3) God spoke to me. Means “Who cares what God says? I made my mind up looong ago. Don’t confuse me with the Word.”
2) I feel called to it. Means “Call shmall…really, I just want to do it.”
1) This is what it means to me. Means a) “I like my version of the Bible much, much better,” or b) “I don’t want to do the hard work required to find out what the text really says.”
There are genuine people who really pray. Some people really don’t have the spiritual gift in question (Evangelism is still the obligation of *every* believer, even though some, and not others, are especially gifted in it!). God really does speak supernaturally (though usually its abundantly clear. The gurgle in your gut is gas, not God.), and God really does call people. But the above 6 slogans are used as crutches more often than not.
What are some other cheap slogans?
: 
: 
: 
: 
: 
: 
: 
: 
: 
: 
: 
LOL.. True
“God works in mysterious ways” – That stinks, but I don’t want to have to be bothered with caring.
“I struggle with [whatever]” – I love my sin, but if I mention it that way, I get to enjoy it AND get sympathy.
Jolly good show, Wickle, especially on the last one!
So true… wickle’s additions are good, too.
“I like my version of the Bible much, much better”
Are you joking? Everyone interprets the Bible differently, your pastor is no different.
Rhett,
If everyone interpreted the Bible differently, there’d be just as many interpretations as there are people. There are a select number of interpretations for a passage, however.
In addition, just because someone interprets the Bible different from me or you doesn’t even mean its right, and it doesn’t mean its right *for them.*
That’s the key phrase: to me…We should be saying “what does the Bible mean?” not “what does it mean to me?” If someone goes with the latter, there’s no correct answer. Someone could just as easily say Gen 1:1 is talking about golf, and he couldn’t be corrected. Why? Because that’s what it means *to him.*
But we never take that sort of attitude towards *any* communication, whether written or spoken. If, for example, I reacted to your comment by saying, “gee, I didn’t know you worshiped Jim Jones,” you’d be incredulous. If I came back and said, “why are you correcting me? That’s what your words mean *to me.*” you’d most likely still object, and rightly so.
Why should the Bible be any different?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Christian_denominations_by_number_of_members
Rhett,
I’m well aware of the numbers on Christian denominations. What’s your point?
Pingback: Don’t Put God in a Box « The Pugnacious Irishman